My third trip to Haiti is slowly, fast approaching. I recognize this feeling now. It is no longer foreign. I can put words to it, experiences to it and emotions to it.
I'm leaving. It's a slow fade as the time approaches. I recognized it that first trip, but it happened much closer to our departure time then. The flights over and back felt like distinct transitions from my world here to my world there. Now, though, it's happening again, but sooner. Over 3 weeks left and I'm finding myself there mentally more often. My heart and mind feel heavy with anticipation and joy and sadness. As much joy as it brings me to be in Haiti with my friends, it is not without mental acrobats.
How is it that I live in such grandeur? And it is just that, grandeur.
I have a roof that doesn't leak(well, just a bit in one corner), TWO vehicles that run, too much food in my fridge, too many clothes and shoes, electricity, internet access, cable, not to mention health insurance and safety and freedom and security. You know, grandeur.
And, how is it that when I'm in Haiti, I feel such a peace like no other.
Maybe it is because I get to exist in both worlds. I can choose to leave here or choose to leave there on a whim. I have the freedom to be where I want to be when I want to be. It is an aspect of my grand life I cannot ignore. So many of my friends in Haiti don't get to choose. They are there. Always.
Maybe I would not think it so peaceful if I had no choices.
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