is to be content in all circumstances,
joyful in all situations,
thankful for the seemingly trivial,
aware of others struggles,
able to smile when things don't go my way,
and happy to hand each moment over to a faithful God.
What I am...
is annoyed when others don't do what I think they should do,
peeved when I think something should go a certain way and it doesn't,
oblivious to behind-the-scene struggles,
grumpy when I know we're in for a rough round,
and mad that my faithful God didn't think my way was better.
And so I'm practicing, still, eucharisteo. Giving thanks. It's not as easy as it may sound. And the more I do it, the more I'm aware at how bad I am at it. It's like putting a spotlight on every single moment I feel mad, grumpy, annoyed, angry, etc, ad nauseum...
I'm struggling with feeling those real, human emotions and pausing to still give thanks in them.
It is bizarre. Saying thank you for something...when I want to yell and pound my fists against the wall.
What a battle we wage...
Friday, March 30, 2012
Monday, March 26, 2012
Weary
I went to my parent's house this weekend. I have spent the past few weeks weary, worn, too tired to do dishes, cook a meal, or be happy. It took so much effort to smile, to be kind.
I can't even tell you a good reason why I felt that way. I just did.
Even as a grown woman, mother to 4, I sometimes need my mom, my dad, their home.
My mom has mentioned a few times this book she had recently read. Just in passing.."You need to read this." Sure, sure. I love a good book.
Friday morning I woke up, curled up in their recliner and rarely left it most of the day. I read. I'm not even done with the book and it has changed me.
A Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp.
Gratitude.
Eucharisteo.
Give thanks.
She took a challenge to list a thousand thank yous. It changed her from a bitter, angry woman who had alot to be bitter about in her past to a grateful, God-seeing, thanks-giving woman. She writes beautifully, powerfully. She is honest about the struggles of life and doesn't sugar-coat the fact that it's nearly impossible to be thankful in ALL circumstances, but that it is possible.
It's given me much to think on.
Eucharisteo.
I'm going to practice it.
I can't even tell you a good reason why I felt that way. I just did.
Even as a grown woman, mother to 4, I sometimes need my mom, my dad, their home.
My mom has mentioned a few times this book she had recently read. Just in passing.."You need to read this." Sure, sure. I love a good book.
Friday morning I woke up, curled up in their recliner and rarely left it most of the day. I read. I'm not even done with the book and it has changed me.
A Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp.
Gratitude.
Eucharisteo.
Give thanks.
She took a challenge to list a thousand thank yous. It changed her from a bitter, angry woman who had alot to be bitter about in her past to a grateful, God-seeing, thanks-giving woman. She writes beautifully, powerfully. She is honest about the struggles of life and doesn't sugar-coat the fact that it's nearly impossible to be thankful in ALL circumstances, but that it is possible.
It's given me much to think on.
Eucharisteo.
I'm going to practice it.
Tuesday, March 20, 2012
Blah, blah, blah, blah
I really don't have much to write about these days. For whatever reason, I feel like I've been operating in a haze the past few weeks. Much more tired then usual...Days have just run from one to the next without anything profound or crazy happening.
I'm ok with that for awhile, but then I start to feel like I need something to shake up the monotony.
We're heading to my parents for the weekend so that will give me something to get ready for, I guess.
My best Caleb story from the past weeks is when he asked a guy who was across the street if he was creepy. That got us all laughing pretty good. Apparently, Caleb yelled across the street, "Hey stranger guy! Are you creepy?" When the guy replied no, he yelled again, "Are you a creepy stranger?" At this point, I'm sure the gentleman was quite uncomfortable (I did not see this exchange, but Autumn did). Caleb came running in and said, "Mom, mom! Don't worry that stranger guy across the street isn't creepy. I asked him and he said no."
Imagine my relief to know that my 3 year old feels comfortable asking strangers if they are creepy! Geez.
I feel a nap coming on...we'll see if the peeps will leave me alone long enough to snooze for a bit.
I'm ok with that for awhile, but then I start to feel like I need something to shake up the monotony.
We're heading to my parents for the weekend so that will give me something to get ready for, I guess.
My best Caleb story from the past weeks is when he asked a guy who was across the street if he was creepy. That got us all laughing pretty good. Apparently, Caleb yelled across the street, "Hey stranger guy! Are you creepy?" When the guy replied no, he yelled again, "Are you a creepy stranger?" At this point, I'm sure the gentleman was quite uncomfortable (I did not see this exchange, but Autumn did). Caleb came running in and said, "Mom, mom! Don't worry that stranger guy across the street isn't creepy. I asked him and he said no."
Imagine my relief to know that my 3 year old feels comfortable asking strangers if they are creepy! Geez.
I feel a nap coming on...we'll see if the peeps will leave me alone long enough to snooze for a bit.
Friday, March 9, 2012
TV
There has been an over-abundance of movie watching going on at our house the past few weeks.
I will occasionally give myself a mental pat on the back because we don't have cable so I somehow think that cuts our TV watching way down.
I'm not so sure after the past few weeks.
Living a block from the library and having 2 older kids that can go on their own whenever means ALOT of free movies rotating through our house.
We've watched Dora the Explorer til we're all yelling "MAP" at the top of our lungs in our sleep. Caillou has made is way into the line-up and it makes me want to pull my hair out, "Caaiiii-yuuuu." I can't stand that whiny kid.
Then we occasionally have Magic School Bus, which means they are learning something, right?
And Autumn loves Little House on the Prairie and the American Girls series.
I could go on, but it's already getting embarrassing.
There is an easy solution to this problem.
I know this.
Just turn it off, right?
It's so easy.
I will...after I finish writing this post and checking Facebook again, and I clear off the table and something else I'm sure I need to do...
Help! My kids are turning into vegetables.
I will occasionally give myself a mental pat on the back because we don't have cable so I somehow think that cuts our TV watching way down.
I'm not so sure after the past few weeks.
Living a block from the library and having 2 older kids that can go on their own whenever means ALOT of free movies rotating through our house.
We've watched Dora the Explorer til we're all yelling "MAP" at the top of our lungs in our sleep. Caillou has made is way into the line-up and it makes me want to pull my hair out, "Caaiiii-yuuuu." I can't stand that whiny kid.
Then we occasionally have Magic School Bus, which means they are learning something, right?
And Autumn loves Little House on the Prairie and the American Girls series.
I could go on, but it's already getting embarrassing.
There is an easy solution to this problem.
I know this.
Just turn it off, right?
It's so easy.
I will...after I finish writing this post and checking Facebook again, and I clear off the table and something else I'm sure I need to do...
Help! My kids are turning into vegetables.
Monday, March 5, 2012
Step ??
Submitted my passport documents today. I realize for the well-traveled individual this is not a big deal.
It happens to be a very big deal to me. It means when the time comes, all I need is a plane ticket. It means I can go to Haiti. My dad is waiting to hear when he can go and teach at the seminary this summer. I'm waiting to hear if those we know can help us along with an adoption.
There is a theme here...waiting...patience is a virtue.
My hope is to be able to go to Haiti with my dad. I haven't talked with him about this, but I'm assuming he's cool with it.
I want to meet these people that my family has talked about for so long.
I want to go to the orphanage.
I want to hold some babies.
I will try not to smuggle them back with me...I said try...
I submitted those papers with an end goal in mind. Not an international vacation (although that sounds really nice).
My end goal is our babies.
I want to bring them home.
I know we are months and years from that end goal, but it's a step...
It happens to be a very big deal to me. It means when the time comes, all I need is a plane ticket. It means I can go to Haiti. My dad is waiting to hear when he can go and teach at the seminary this summer. I'm waiting to hear if those we know can help us along with an adoption.
There is a theme here...waiting...patience is a virtue.
My hope is to be able to go to Haiti with my dad. I haven't talked with him about this, but I'm assuming he's cool with it.
I want to meet these people that my family has talked about for so long.
I want to go to the orphanage.
I want to hold some babies.
I will try not to smuggle them back with me...I said try...
I submitted those papers with an end goal in mind. Not an international vacation (although that sounds really nice).
My end goal is our babies.
I want to bring them home.
I know we are months and years from that end goal, but it's a step...
Thursday, March 1, 2012
Warning
I'm talking about sex in this post...
I don't usually go on record to voice my stance on the issues that are currently running through our political system.
There is one that keeps coming up in the news that I have pretty strong feelings about...birth control as a health issue.
Let me start this off with saying that I know there are genuine health problems that birth control pills are used for treating and I do not consider that equivalent to taking birth control pills to prevent pregnancy. Two different issues, as far as I'm concerned.
My issue, I suppose, is that we are essentially legislating sex. I do have a problem with that. Since when was sex included in our inalienable rights? It is a choice, not a right. How I choose to conceive or prevent conception should be on my financial shoulders. Not the American public.
I honestly think that we must insist that as a society we understand that with this CHOICE comes responsibility, instead of essentially, saying, "Go for it. We got your back. We'll pay for your bc pills, we'll provide you with abortions, we'll treat your STD's and we'll make sure you don't have to deal with an unwanted baby all so you can keep having sex any which way you want."
I am not just speaking to those who are promiscous, either. I'm talking to the married folk, the "committed" relationship people, the youth, the adults, everyone.
If I myself choose to have sex, then I must bear the responsibility, whether that be a child, STD, emotional baggage and all the good stuff too, that comes with that choice.
Why does my employer and therefore, the American public, need to bear the weight of my choice. If I take bc pills to prevent pregnancy, but I cannot afford those pills on my own, then maybe I shouldn't be having sex. And I know this is shocking, but there other ways to prevent pregnancy and STD's then a pill.
Again, if I have a health issue that birth control pills relieve, that is a different topic all together.
It is truly just baffling to me that we have become a society that has allowed our Congress to be so intimately involved in our sex lives. Oh, I know, it's a women's health issue. Bull.
It is another case of entitlement. Pay for my pills so I can have sex without responsibility.
I know that it's not quite this cut and dry, but it's much more cut and dry then people want to make it. And it makes me a little batty when it constantly comes back to a "women's health issue." It's a choice issue. It's a responsibility issue. It's a sex education issue, as in don't have sex unless you can be responsible for the results of that action.
I absolutely understand that there are fierce opponents to my opinions. People get nasty about this kind of thing. Don't be messin' with my sex life-kind of nasty. I don't want to mess with your sex life, in fact, I'd like you to keep that all to yourself, including the monetary cost of your choices.
We shouldn't be covering birth control unless there is a medical condition. Not wanting to get pregnant is NOT a medical condition. Just watch...next we're going to be required to pay for boob jobs because it's a womens health issue.
And, I'm now stepping down off my soap box and resuming my quiet life. :-)
I don't usually go on record to voice my stance on the issues that are currently running through our political system.
There is one that keeps coming up in the news that I have pretty strong feelings about...birth control as a health issue.
Let me start this off with saying that I know there are genuine health problems that birth control pills are used for treating and I do not consider that equivalent to taking birth control pills to prevent pregnancy. Two different issues, as far as I'm concerned.
My issue, I suppose, is that we are essentially legislating sex. I do have a problem with that. Since when was sex included in our inalienable rights? It is a choice, not a right. How I choose to conceive or prevent conception should be on my financial shoulders. Not the American public.
I honestly think that we must insist that as a society we understand that with this CHOICE comes responsibility, instead of essentially, saying, "Go for it. We got your back. We'll pay for your bc pills, we'll provide you with abortions, we'll treat your STD's and we'll make sure you don't have to deal with an unwanted baby all so you can keep having sex any which way you want."
I am not just speaking to those who are promiscous, either. I'm talking to the married folk, the "committed" relationship people, the youth, the adults, everyone.
If I myself choose to have sex, then I must bear the responsibility, whether that be a child, STD, emotional baggage and all the good stuff too, that comes with that choice.
Why does my employer and therefore, the American public, need to bear the weight of my choice. If I take bc pills to prevent pregnancy, but I cannot afford those pills on my own, then maybe I shouldn't be having sex. And I know this is shocking, but there other ways to prevent pregnancy and STD's then a pill.
Again, if I have a health issue that birth control pills relieve, that is a different topic all together.
It is truly just baffling to me that we have become a society that has allowed our Congress to be so intimately involved in our sex lives. Oh, I know, it's a women's health issue. Bull.
It is another case of entitlement. Pay for my pills so I can have sex without responsibility.
I know that it's not quite this cut and dry, but it's much more cut and dry then people want to make it. And it makes me a little batty when it constantly comes back to a "women's health issue." It's a choice issue. It's a responsibility issue. It's a sex education issue, as in don't have sex unless you can be responsible for the results of that action.
I absolutely understand that there are fierce opponents to my opinions. People get nasty about this kind of thing. Don't be messin' with my sex life-kind of nasty. I don't want to mess with your sex life, in fact, I'd like you to keep that all to yourself, including the monetary cost of your choices.
We shouldn't be covering birth control unless there is a medical condition. Not wanting to get pregnant is NOT a medical condition. Just watch...next we're going to be required to pay for boob jobs because it's a womens health issue.
And, I'm now stepping down off my soap box and resuming my quiet life. :-)
Tuesday, February 28, 2012
Pondering
I've been wondering lately if I'm actually necessary to the functioning of my home and parenting of my children. I've been SUPER lazy lately.
I am tired.
Bored.
I feel like I'm in a holding pattern.
Just waiting...for what?
I'm not sure.
I'm waiting to hear from Haiti, but that shouldn't interfere with my ability to function, right?
I'm waiting to do some projects around the house, but I'm also waiting for the motivation to kick in to do said projects.
I'm waiting to see if Chad hears about an online teaching job, but this does not affect my day to day life much...or does it?
I know on a conscious level that these things do not mean that I cannot do the dishes or a few loads of laundry, but that is exactly what my brain is telling me.
"No don't do those dishes just yet. You might get an email from Haiti."
"Better wait on that laundry. You might decide to go to the store and get stuff to paint the bathroom, put up baseboards in the mudroom or haul insane amounts of junk up from the basement!"
"Hold it! Don't clean the bathroom. You may hear that Chad was hired."
Stupid, right?
I know this.
Help me.
I am tired.
Bored.
I feel like I'm in a holding pattern.
Just waiting...for what?
I'm not sure.
I'm waiting to hear from Haiti, but that shouldn't interfere with my ability to function, right?
I'm waiting to do some projects around the house, but I'm also waiting for the motivation to kick in to do said projects.
I'm waiting to see if Chad hears about an online teaching job, but this does not affect my day to day life much...or does it?
I know on a conscious level that these things do not mean that I cannot do the dishes or a few loads of laundry, but that is exactly what my brain is telling me.
"No don't do those dishes just yet. You might get an email from Haiti."
"Better wait on that laundry. You might decide to go to the store and get stuff to paint the bathroom, put up baseboards in the mudroom or haul insane amounts of junk up from the basement!"
"Hold it! Don't clean the bathroom. You may hear that Chad was hired."
Stupid, right?
I know this.
Help me.
Friday, February 24, 2012
Life goes on...
Not much slows us down, unfortunately.I had 2 days of near bliss with the hubs home and basically bed or couch-ridden. I'm not kidding that I dream about that. I could just lay or sit down next to him whenever I want. For a girl who barely sees him for days on end, I'm telling ya, I was possibly a little thankful for that broken arm.
It only kept him home for about 2 1/2 days, though. He's slowly getting back to work and sleeping the rest of the time.
I haven't decided if he's sleeping so much cause he's tired or depressed. I'm leaning towards the latter so I'll be keeping a close eye on him. Don't tell him that if you see him though.
*************************************************
No word from Haiti yet. I was told they only check email once or twice a week so I'm trying to be patient. It's hard.
*************************************************
Last basketball weekend for this season. We're going to divide and conquer again, but it generally works out ok. I've really enjoyed watching the kids play this year. They're just so stinkin' cute...don't tell Elijah that though. He's a 5th grader and can't be "cute" anymore.
*************************************************
I went to see The Music Man tonight with my lovely friend, Nancy. It was wonderful. I so enjoy theater and every time I go to something I remember why, but I don't go nearly enough.
*************************************************
I'm all over the place in this post. Lots of things on my mind.
I'm looking forward to a quiet weekend at some point...say in 15 years or so...hopefully not quite that long.
It only kept him home for about 2 1/2 days, though. He's slowly getting back to work and sleeping the rest of the time.
I haven't decided if he's sleeping so much cause he's tired or depressed. I'm leaning towards the latter so I'll be keeping a close eye on him. Don't tell him that if you see him though.
*************************************************
No word from Haiti yet. I was told they only check email once or twice a week so I'm trying to be patient. It's hard.
*************************************************
Last basketball weekend for this season. We're going to divide and conquer again, but it generally works out ok. I've really enjoyed watching the kids play this year. They're just so stinkin' cute...don't tell Elijah that though. He's a 5th grader and can't be "cute" anymore.
*************************************************
I went to see The Music Man tonight with my lovely friend, Nancy. It was wonderful. I so enjoy theater and every time I go to something I remember why, but I don't go nearly enough.
*************************************************
I'm all over the place in this post. Lots of things on my mind.
I'm looking forward to a quiet weekend at some point...say in 15 years or so...hopefully not quite that long.
Wednesday, February 22, 2012
He what?
"Your husband just broke his arm."
"You're kidding me."
"No, I'm not."
Not the phone call I was planning on getting yesterday.
My super studly hubs was maxing out on the clean with a friend. He PRed, went for one more and bumped his elbow on the the knee when he caught it and SNAP. His radius was now in 2 pieces.
It could have been a bit of a scramble to find someone to take the kids for the afternoon, but because we have the most fabulous friends ever, they were taken care of in a matter of 5 minutes. Katie was here in a few minutes and Natasha took them for the afternoon. I was able to get over to the Y 10 minutes after I got the call. That's whatcha call amazing.
The EMS got Chad put in an air cast and I took him to our doctor for an X-ray. One look and the doc. sent us to an ortho doctor. Said he thought surgery would be needed. He was right.
We went straight to the ortho and he scheduled surgery for this morning at 10. Again, our friends jumped in! We have dinner and even lunch (BONUS!) for the next few days. I'm thinking about breaking my arm next week to keep this going...kidding, kidding...maybe....
Surgery went great. He didn't need a pin in his wrist which means he'll only have a soft cast for 1 week and a hard cast for 2. Really best case scenerio.
I had 2 sweet friends sit with me from pre-op through post-op and they made the time go by so quickly! I had super awesome friends take care of our kiddos all day and dude, did I mention we have food for the next 3 days??
I did. Sorry. That makes me super excited! :-)
Chad will be back doing what he does, which is entirely too much for one human, in a few short days I'm sure. He has thankfully not been in much pain through it all and has been in good spirits, overall.
He is, of course, super bummed cause he's going to have to rehab and it will set him back on his personal workouts some. I'm betting it won't much though. The CrossFit Open started today, which is the real wrench in this. He was registered to compete and is already talking about doing whatever the workouts are one-armed. I don't doubt that he'll give it a go.
I think I married a robot. A good lookin', kind, funny, brilliant robot, but a robot, nontheless.
"You're kidding me."
"No, I'm not."
Not the phone call I was planning on getting yesterday.
My super studly hubs was maxing out on the clean with a friend. He PRed, went for one more and bumped his elbow on the the knee when he caught it and SNAP. His radius was now in 2 pieces.
It could have been a bit of a scramble to find someone to take the kids for the afternoon, but because we have the most fabulous friends ever, they were taken care of in a matter of 5 minutes. Katie was here in a few minutes and Natasha took them for the afternoon. I was able to get over to the Y 10 minutes after I got the call. That's whatcha call amazing.
The EMS got Chad put in an air cast and I took him to our doctor for an X-ray. One look and the doc. sent us to an ortho doctor. Said he thought surgery would be needed. He was right.
We went straight to the ortho and he scheduled surgery for this morning at 10. Again, our friends jumped in! We have dinner and even lunch (BONUS!) for the next few days. I'm thinking about breaking my arm next week to keep this going...kidding, kidding...maybe....
Surgery went great. He didn't need a pin in his wrist which means he'll only have a soft cast for 1 week and a hard cast for 2. Really best case scenerio.
I had 2 sweet friends sit with me from pre-op through post-op and they made the time go by so quickly! I had super awesome friends take care of our kiddos all day and dude, did I mention we have food for the next 3 days??
I did. Sorry. That makes me super excited! :-)
Chad will be back doing what he does, which is entirely too much for one human, in a few short days I'm sure. He has thankfully not been in much pain through it all and has been in good spirits, overall.
He is, of course, super bummed cause he's going to have to rehab and it will set him back on his personal workouts some. I'm betting it won't much though. The CrossFit Open started today, which is the real wrench in this. He was registered to compete and is already talking about doing whatever the workouts are one-armed. I don't doubt that he'll give it a go.
I think I married a robot. A good lookin', kind, funny, brilliant robot, but a robot, nontheless.
Monday, February 20, 2012
Letter
I was able to get an email address to Nadine, who is Pastor and Lucy's daughter...here is the letter I wrote to her. Some day, I hope our Haiti babies will be able to read this and see that they were loved long before they came to us!
***************************************************
Our families have a long history together. My grandparents, Willie and Marge Dahlke were missionaries in Haiti years ago and got to know your parents very well. Since that time my parents, Pastor Jim and Claudia Dahlke, have been in touch with Pastor and Lucy and many others in the Lutheran Church in Haiti over the years. I can't tell you how my family hurt for yours when we heard of your father's death. I grew up hearing stories of his faithfulness and courage in spreading the Gospel in Haiti and our family grieved for your family and for all those in Haiti who lost such a wonderful man.
From a very early age, I loved Haiti. I will never forget meeting Israel and Thomas when they came to the seminary. I was just a young girl, but loved them immediately and they were so good natured in letting me hold their hands, sit on their laps and love on them.
Many years have passed and I have been married to Chad for almost 12 years and we have 4 children-Elijah is 11, Autumn is 9 (her middle name is Nadine!), Cory is 6 and Caleb is 3. We are very blessed!
From early on in our marriage, we would occasionally talk about adopting at some point. For many years, it was simply talk and no more. Recently, however, we felt moved to act and begin the process of adoption.
Haiti is where my heart is. This may sound strange, but I have often prayed for our children there. I did not know who they were, where they lived or even if they were born yet! What I did believe is that they were meant to be ours. We have an open heart and home to bring a sibling group of any ages to our home in Kansas.
With the history my family has with yours, I felt it only right to send you a letter and not only tell you of our plans, but to ask for your prayers and any assistance you may be able to give us as we go through this process. My mother mentioned that your husband, George, is a lawyer and may be able to offer some advice as to the adoption process.
We have not yet chosen an agency to work with. If you know of any that have worked directly with the orphanage in Les Cayes, we would love to know which ones those are. If you have any insight into the children or family units that are at the orphanage, schools or churches, we would love your guidance in that matter, as well.
I would love to keep in touch with you as we continue on. My father is planning a trip to the teach at the seminary this summer and I have hopes to travel with him.
If I am able, I would love to speak with you in person at that time.
God's blessings,
***************************************************
Our families have a long history together. My grandparents, Willie and Marge Dahlke were missionaries in Haiti years ago and got to know your parents very well. Since that time my parents, Pastor Jim and Claudia Dahlke, have been in touch with Pastor and Lucy and many others in the Lutheran Church in Haiti over the years. I can't tell you how my family hurt for yours when we heard of your father's death. I grew up hearing stories of his faithfulness and courage in spreading the Gospel in Haiti and our family grieved for your family and for all those in Haiti who lost such a wonderful man.
From a very early age, I loved Haiti. I will never forget meeting Israel and Thomas when they came to the seminary. I was just a young girl, but loved them immediately and they were so good natured in letting me hold their hands, sit on their laps and love on them.
Many years have passed and I have been married to Chad for almost 12 years and we have 4 children-Elijah is 11, Autumn is 9 (her middle name is Nadine!), Cory is 6 and Caleb is 3. We are very blessed!
From early on in our marriage, we would occasionally talk about adopting at some point. For many years, it was simply talk and no more. Recently, however, we felt moved to act and begin the process of adoption.
Haiti is where my heart is. This may sound strange, but I have often prayed for our children there. I did not know who they were, where they lived or even if they were born yet! What I did believe is that they were meant to be ours. We have an open heart and home to bring a sibling group of any ages to our home in Kansas.
With the history my family has with yours, I felt it only right to send you a letter and not only tell you of our plans, but to ask for your prayers and any assistance you may be able to give us as we go through this process. My mother mentioned that your husband, George, is a lawyer and may be able to offer some advice as to the adoption process.
We have not yet chosen an agency to work with. If you know of any that have worked directly with the orphanage in Les Cayes, we would love to know which ones those are. If you have any insight into the children or family units that are at the orphanage, schools or churches, we would love your guidance in that matter, as well.
I would love to keep in touch with you as we continue on. My father is planning a trip to the teach at the seminary this summer and I have hopes to travel with him.
If I am able, I would love to speak with you in person at that time.
God's blessings,
Research, pray, research, pray...
Aside from the normal day-day activities like work, schooling, cleaning, exercise, cooking, of course.
So far I've found quite a few organizations that provide grants for international adoption. Getting just one of those would be so helpful. Most require you to have already done a home study already.
We haven't applied with an adoption agency yet. The reason being is that I'm putting together a letter with our information to be sent to our family acquaintance who is a lawyer. I am curious as to how they may be able to help and I don't want to pay an agency without knowing what, if any, advice he can give us.
In other news...Elijah had a basketball tournament this weekend so we watched a lot of ball and spent alot of time wasting time. We blew a tire yesterday in between games and had to get 2 replaced. Apparently our alignment is way off and it destroyed our 2 back tires. The upside of this is that we have a little extra money right now so that was nice.
So, a car repair is in our weekly schedule now.
So far I've found quite a few organizations that provide grants for international adoption. Getting just one of those would be so helpful. Most require you to have already done a home study already.
We haven't applied with an adoption agency yet. The reason being is that I'm putting together a letter with our information to be sent to our family acquaintance who is a lawyer. I am curious as to how they may be able to help and I don't want to pay an agency without knowing what, if any, advice he can give us.
In other news...Elijah had a basketball tournament this weekend so we watched a lot of ball and spent alot of time wasting time. We blew a tire yesterday in between games and had to get 2 replaced. Apparently our alignment is way off and it destroyed our 2 back tires. The upside of this is that we have a little extra money right now so that was nice.
So, a car repair is in our weekly schedule now.
Friday, February 17, 2012
Elijah
Sensitive
Respectful
Helpful
Compassionate
Athletic
Honest
Competitive
Kind
Introspective
Humorous
Hardworking
He's 11 today...and we couldn't be more proud of the young man he is becoming.
Respectful
Helpful
Compassionate
Athletic
Honest
Competitive
Kind
Introspective
Humorous
Hardworking
He's 11 today...and we couldn't be more proud of the young man he is becoming.
Thursday, February 16, 2012
Baby steps and a leap of faith
I don't think I ever really understood the term, "leap of faith" til this past week.
We're completely blind to what will happen with adopting from Haiti. I hesitate even saying that's what we're doing because we're so early on and haven't even applied with an agency or put a dime towards it.
The truth is we live blind every day, but for some reason we seem to think we know what will happen day to day for the most part. We plan our days going from one activity or appointment to the next not terribly concerned about the "unknown."
I have this vision of us standing on a cliff with no visibility as to what is below us, and we just jump, with no fear. A true leap of faith.
So here's our progress so far...I got in touch with one agency to see if they would work with the orphanage that we would like to adopt from. They will as long as it's licensed and reputable(which it is.)
I also spoke with the man, Dick, who is instrumental in running the Haiti Lutheran Mission Society. He has known my family for decades and was very good friends with my grandpa. He is going to Haiti the end of March and said he would get as much information for us as he can. Lucy is Pastor Louis's widow and their son-in-law is a lawyer in Haiti and Dick will also be speaking with him. My hope is that we can work directly with him to find our children! Crazy, right??
Hope is a beautiful thing. We have much hope today.
We're completely blind to what will happen with adopting from Haiti. I hesitate even saying that's what we're doing because we're so early on and haven't even applied with an agency or put a dime towards it.
The truth is we live blind every day, but for some reason we seem to think we know what will happen day to day for the most part. We plan our days going from one activity or appointment to the next not terribly concerned about the "unknown."
I have this vision of us standing on a cliff with no visibility as to what is below us, and we just jump, with no fear. A true leap of faith.
So here's our progress so far...I got in touch with one agency to see if they would work with the orphanage that we would like to adopt from. They will as long as it's licensed and reputable(which it is.)
I also spoke with the man, Dick, who is instrumental in running the Haiti Lutheran Mission Society. He has known my family for decades and was very good friends with my grandpa. He is going to Haiti the end of March and said he would get as much information for us as he can. Lucy is Pastor Louis's widow and their son-in-law is a lawyer in Haiti and Dick will also be speaking with him. My hope is that we can work directly with him to find our children! Crazy, right??
Hope is a beautiful thing. We have much hope today.
Monday, February 13, 2012
There is a stirring...
in my soul.
I first fell in love with Haiti at an early age. My grandparents were missionaries there and helped bring men to the US to go to seminary training so they could go back to Haiti as pastors and spread the Gospel to their people.
I must have been 8 or 9 when I first met Israel and Thomas, 2 young men going to seminary in Fort Wayne, IN.
Oh, I loved them at first sight. I was particularly draw to Israel. He had the most beautiful smile and he didn't mind that I wanted to always hold his hand or hug him.
I met these 2 men just so very briefly, but our family has always kept in touch with friends in Haiti who are involved with the Lutheran church there.
Haiti Lutheran Mission Society is an organization here in the states that raises money specifically for the Lutheran church in Haiti. They help fund 5 churches, 4 schools, an orphanage, a medical clinic, and a seminary. My dad has gone to their seminary in Port Au Prince twice to teach a course.
There has always been a part of me that loves this little country so ravaged by corruption, violence, disease and poverty. I grew up hearing beautiful stories of God's grace in the lives of many of those we know there.
Chad and I have talked over the years on and off about adoption. It's always been talk. No action.
There is a good bit of fear of the unknown when you start walking down this path. Lots of questions.
How can we afford this?
How will it affect our children?
Will we be able to raise them faithfully?
I have thought about adopting from Haiti forever. This may sound completely crazy, and I can't even say it without crying, but I believe we have children in Haiti that are meant to be ours. I always have. And I do mean children, not child. Siblings, cousins, more then one.
I so desperately want to bring them home. I have prayed for them for years.
Every few months, I am just overcome with emotion about them. Different things trigger it. This particular time was a book my sister Ang gave me.
Please read it. It's called Kisses from Katie and it's by Katie Davis. If it doesn't make you cry and move you to do something, anything for the millions of poverty-striken children of the world, I don't know what will. It is an enormous testament of God's faithfulness and power when we say yes.
This idea of actually adopting is very foreign to my husband. He's a planner, details kind of guy and the amount of money it would cost concerns him. We've talked again about just taking the first steps. Getting as much information as we can now. Praying alot. Getting in touch with those we know in Haiti.
I'm so nervous and emotional about this. We will have to do some saving and fundraising. I think we both agree that the idea of adoption only makes us pause because of the money. I don't want that to be the thing that stops us so we'll pray and work and save and take those first steps...who knows what doors God will open.
I first fell in love with Haiti at an early age. My grandparents were missionaries there and helped bring men to the US to go to seminary training so they could go back to Haiti as pastors and spread the Gospel to their people.
I must have been 8 or 9 when I first met Israel and Thomas, 2 young men going to seminary in Fort Wayne, IN.
Oh, I loved them at first sight. I was particularly draw to Israel. He had the most beautiful smile and he didn't mind that I wanted to always hold his hand or hug him.
I met these 2 men just so very briefly, but our family has always kept in touch with friends in Haiti who are involved with the Lutheran church there.
Haiti Lutheran Mission Society is an organization here in the states that raises money specifically for the Lutheran church in Haiti. They help fund 5 churches, 4 schools, an orphanage, a medical clinic, and a seminary. My dad has gone to their seminary in Port Au Prince twice to teach a course.
There has always been a part of me that loves this little country so ravaged by corruption, violence, disease and poverty. I grew up hearing beautiful stories of God's grace in the lives of many of those we know there.
Chad and I have talked over the years on and off about adoption. It's always been talk. No action.
There is a good bit of fear of the unknown when you start walking down this path. Lots of questions.
How can we afford this?
How will it affect our children?
Will we be able to raise them faithfully?
I have thought about adopting from Haiti forever. This may sound completely crazy, and I can't even say it without crying, but I believe we have children in Haiti that are meant to be ours. I always have. And I do mean children, not child. Siblings, cousins, more then one.
I so desperately want to bring them home. I have prayed for them for years.
Every few months, I am just overcome with emotion about them. Different things trigger it. This particular time was a book my sister Ang gave me.
Please read it. It's called Kisses from Katie and it's by Katie Davis. If it doesn't make you cry and move you to do something, anything for the millions of poverty-striken children of the world, I don't know what will. It is an enormous testament of God's faithfulness and power when we say yes.
This idea of actually adopting is very foreign to my husband. He's a planner, details kind of guy and the amount of money it would cost concerns him. We've talked again about just taking the first steps. Getting as much information as we can now. Praying alot. Getting in touch with those we know in Haiti.
I'm so nervous and emotional about this. We will have to do some saving and fundraising. I think we both agree that the idea of adoption only makes us pause because of the money. I don't want that to be the thing that stops us so we'll pray and work and save and take those first steps...who knows what doors God will open.
Finito!
Es terminado!
C'est fini!
Es ist fertig gestellt!
It's finished!
I'm so happy I decided to speak in different languages!
We're done with the shower tiling.
Here are a few final pics to enjoy...
It's kinda hard to tell, but he's soaked.
I have a confession to make.
He cut tiles for about 6 hours on Super Bowl Sunday.
What kind of wife asks that of her football-loving husband?!?!? The humanity!! The cruelty!!
He didn't hardly complain at all.
Cutting tiles is not fun. You get sprayed with gallons of water, tile chips and clay-like stuff each time you make a cut. He was a trooper and we got all but a few for the edge around the corner done in one day. He cut. I put them up. This was not really all that fun either, but at least I wasn't get sprayed in the face with tile debris.
We took FOREVER to get this project done, but I really do like how it turned out. Don't look too close if you're ever in the shower though. Lots of uneven tiles.
These pics are pre-caulked. I just did that yesterday. We still can't shower til Saturday, but we're all pretty used to bathing, old-school style now anyway.
I'll give the hubs a break for awhile, but I'm pretty anxious to get the floor done. Don't tell him.
C'est fini!
Es ist fertig gestellt!
It's finished!
I'm so happy I decided to speak in different languages!
We're done with the shower tiling.
Here are a few final pics to enjoy...
I have a confession to make.
He cut tiles for about 6 hours on Super Bowl Sunday.
What kind of wife asks that of her football-loving husband?!?!? The humanity!! The cruelty!!
He didn't hardly complain at all.
Cutting tiles is not fun. You get sprayed with gallons of water, tile chips and clay-like stuff each time you make a cut. He was a trooper and we got all but a few for the edge around the corner done in one day. He cut. I put them up. This was not really all that fun either, but at least I wasn't get sprayed in the face with tile debris.
We took FOREVER to get this project done, but I really do like how it turned out. Don't look too close if you're ever in the shower though. Lots of uneven tiles.
These pics are pre-caulked. I just did that yesterday. We still can't shower til Saturday, but we're all pretty used to bathing, old-school style now anyway.
Friday, February 3, 2012
Shower progress
I'm not a professional, but I'm liking how it's coming along.
We went ahead and demo-ed all the drywall out. We had some concerns as to what was behind that outside wall because we had insulation blown in this summer and didn't want it all over the place. Turned out after asking the right person, that there was rolled out insulation closest to the wall so we were good!
We then used roofing felt to line the walls as a vapor barrier. If we were to do this again I would use plastic sheeting. The roofing felt was difficult to manuever and staple into the studs. It worked out fine, but was harder to use then plastic I think.
Then we put up the cement board which took a couple nights. It's wasn't terribly difficult, just a lot of measuring, scouring and drilling.
Then I taped the seams and applied thin-set mortar over the tape.
We went ahead and demo-ed all the drywall out. We had some concerns as to what was behind that outside wall because we had insulation blown in this summer and didn't want it all over the place. Turned out after asking the right person, that there was rolled out insulation closest to the wall so we were good!
Max felt the need to "help"
After a full day+ to dry I started laying up the tile.
This is by far the messiest part (I'm messy with all things home-improvement related), but not hard to do at all. Our walls are not level or even so I've had to just do the best I can to get them to look nice. I'm done laying all the tiles that I don't have to cut so now we experiment with cutting tiles!
It's been fun and a good learning experience and I can't til it done! :)
Monday, January 30, 2012
Numerals
1. I ADORE healthy children. You know, the obnoxious, quarrelsome, rebellious, loud kind.
2. I revel in beautiful sun-shiny days that said healthy children can go play in.
3. I admire my daughter for being able to whip up a batch of chocolate chip cookies that are AMAZING with NO help from me.
4. I love it when leftovers taste better then the first go round.
5. My hip flexors hurt.
6. I cut my baby's hair. It makes me cry. Sorry the video is sideways.
I sent this video to my dad who is the "BALD grandpa." He thought Caleb said "balls" rather then BALD. I think balls would have been much funnier!!
I fake cried for a good hour after.mostly because Caleb would run up to me and hug me and say, "Mom, Mommy, it's ok. I'll still be your baby."
WWWAAHHHHH!!!!
2. I revel in beautiful sun-shiny days that said healthy children can go play in.
3. I admire my daughter for being able to whip up a batch of chocolate chip cookies that are AMAZING with NO help from me.
4. I love it when leftovers taste better then the first go round.
5. My hip flexors hurt.
6. I cut my baby's hair. It makes me cry. Sorry the video is sideways.
I sent this video to my dad who is the "BALD grandpa." He thought Caleb said "balls" rather then BALD. I think balls would have been much funnier!!
I fake cried for a good hour after.mostly because Caleb would run up to me and hug me and say, "Mom, Mommy, it's ok. I'll still be your baby."
WWWAAHHHHH!!!!
Friday, January 27, 2012
Sick babies, sleep deprivation and gratitude
We've been super fortunate healthwise this winter, if you want to call it a winter. Hard to believe "winter" means 50 degree weather most days.
I will forever compare our illnesses to the winter of 2010-2011, which was actually a legitimate winter with snow and below 0 temps. We were sick for 3+ months straight. It was painful and depressing.
We've got a bout of the flu making it's rounds now and it's ok. I don't like it when they're sick. It means sleepless nights for us all, tears, pain and discomfort. But they let me snuggle with them and they'll get better. We'll ride this out and be ok soon.
Having sick kids for a few days ALWAYS makes me appreciate that I have healthy kids 99 % of the time. I may lose sleep going from one child to the next all night, but some parents do that every night for months or years.
It's so easy to fall into the "poor me" syndrome when kids are sick, plans have to be changed and you're stuck at home for days at a time. I've been there.
What I've found to work much better is to hug them and kiss them, watch movies with them and thank God that they will be back to their normal, destructive, obnoxious, loud selves soon.
I will forever compare our illnesses to the winter of 2010-2011, which was actually a legitimate winter with snow and below 0 temps. We were sick for 3+ months straight. It was painful and depressing.
We've got a bout of the flu making it's rounds now and it's ok. I don't like it when they're sick. It means sleepless nights for us all, tears, pain and discomfort. But they let me snuggle with them and they'll get better. We'll ride this out and be ok soon.
Having sick kids for a few days ALWAYS makes me appreciate that I have healthy kids 99 % of the time. I may lose sleep going from one child to the next all night, but some parents do that every night for months or years.
It's so easy to fall into the "poor me" syndrome when kids are sick, plans have to be changed and you're stuck at home for days at a time. I've been there.
What I've found to work much better is to hug them and kiss them, watch movies with them and thank God that they will be back to their normal, destructive, obnoxious, loud selves soon.
Thursday, January 26, 2012
We're dropping like flies.
Elijah was sick from Saturday til Tuesday.
Good ole' fashion flu symptoms.
Achy, weak, headache, fever.
Sent him to school healthy yesterday.
Cory wakes up this a.m. with the same symptoms and Caleb joined the party this afternoon.
I'm feeling it coming on, as well.
Not sure if it's sympathy pains or not. Hoping so and not the real deal.
When we get something like this going on, I kinda feel like I want everyone to lick the same glass and just get it over with.
Except for me.
And Chad. He doesn't have time to be sick. He hasn't taken a sick day in 5 years, so I'm gonna bet this one passes him too.
Good ole' fashion flu symptoms.
Achy, weak, headache, fever.
Sent him to school healthy yesterday.
Cory wakes up this a.m. with the same symptoms and Caleb joined the party this afternoon.
I'm feeling it coming on, as well.
Not sure if it's sympathy pains or not. Hoping so and not the real deal.
When we get something like this going on, I kinda feel like I want everyone to lick the same glass and just get it over with.
Except for me.
And Chad. He doesn't have time to be sick. He hasn't taken a sick day in 5 years, so I'm gonna bet this one passes him too.
Sunday, January 22, 2012
DIY
It's so easy.
All you have to do is tear out some walls, put some new walls up, lay some mastic, some tile, grout it and WAH-LA you have a newly tiled shower!
HAHA!!
This is our first project as homeowners.
I'd be lying if I didn't say I've lost some sleep over it. We weren't really planning on doing this one for a few months, but a water spot on our kitchen ceiling had us running to Lowes ASAP!
I just don't want to screw it up.
It's just a tiled shower, right?
No big deal!
This may take us weeks...I'll take a few pictures along the way.
All you have to do is tear out some walls, put some new walls up, lay some mastic, some tile, grout it and WAH-LA you have a newly tiled shower!
HAHA!!
This is our first project as homeowners.
I'd be lying if I didn't say I've lost some sleep over it. We weren't really planning on doing this one for a few months, but a water spot on our kitchen ceiling had us running to Lowes ASAP!
I just don't want to screw it up.
It's just a tiled shower, right?
No big deal!
This may take us weeks...I'll take a few pictures along the way.
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